That wobbly thing...

I saw a body. A mass or maybe the absence of mass

Fluid, unstable, sensitive

It was like a wobbly thing

When the wind blew. It would wobble with it. It would move and shift and displace

It was a lousy body, that looked as a man who was drunk

But then my hand touched the surface, I thought it would wobble again

Or atleast shift a bit

But instead, it parted

To accommodate my hand

To absorb me

I was drowning

I was melting

I was dissolving

I was disintegrating

Only to integrate into an endless me...

Kal raat..

Kal raat ko karvat badalti rahi. Par neend nahi aayi. Neend aa jaati toh shaayad sab kuch theek ho jaata. Swapn sa. Par zindagi ki sacchai ki thand lagti rahi, aur uss thand mein theethoorte hue main neend ka swapn dekti rahi.

Waqt...

Uss din tumhaara phone aaya tha
Kai dino ke baad

Kai sawaal
Ek ke peeche ek,
Apne turn ke liye,
Ek lambi kataar mein ghanton khade rehte.

Kaise ho? Kya kar rahe ho?
Kya sardi hain wahaan?
Kya wahan bhi tumhaari naak par pasina rehta hain?
Kya aaj tumhaare aasmaan ka chand utna hi sunder hain jitna mere aasman ka?
Meri yaad aati hain…? Vagera Vagera.

Baaton ka silsila thamta hi nahi tha…

Tum mere har shabd ko jaante the,
Har shabd ke arth ko pehchaante the,
Aur kabhi kabhi jo shabdon mein nahi kehti
Us baat ko bhi tum jaan lete the.

Kitna kuch kehna tha
Kitna kuch sunna tha
Saare shabdon ko jodkar bhi
Hamaari baatein adhoori reh jaati

Aur aaj … Phir phone pe baat hui
Kai dinon ke baad

Sawaal aaj bhi kai saare the.
Kuch wohi purane, kuch naye se
Kuch kehna the,
Kuch sunna tha.

Par phir ek shor mein tumhaari awaaz
dhoondhli si padti chali gayi
Shaayad bheed apna kaam kar rahi thi
Aur waqt apna...

Hatred hurts...

Casting of your life..

I was talking to a friend of mine who told me that whatever you do, you should never go wrong when you cast yourself in your own life.

Everyone's trying to cast themselves in a role in their life. Someone is the cool one, someone the cute one, someone is matured one, the funny one, talented one, alternative, straightforward, arty, delicate,strong,sexy,tomboy,carefree, pseudo-intellectual and the list goes on. We dress accordingly, behave accordingly.

I wonder what the world would be without these archetypes. Less interesting... Maybe. More honest... Maybe..

Yeh hai uss paudhe ke naam...

Maine apne aangan mein ek chota sa paudha lagaaya tha. Harroz usey main thoda thoda badhta dekhti. Acha lagta hain jab aapke khudke haathon se boya hua ek chota sa beej dheere ek sunder se paudhe ka roop lene lagta hain. Phir naye patte aate hain, choti choti kaliyaan aur phir rangbirangi phool. Saara aangan un phoolon ki khusboo main mehekta rehta. Kal raat ko zor se baarish hui thi. Subah dekha toh mera woh pauda bah gaya tha. Usne baarish se jhoonjhne ki koshish zaroor ki hogi.. Shaayad usne mujhe yaad bhi kiya hoga aur shaayad mujhe bulaane ki bhi koshish ki hogi.
Kal raat ki zordar baarish mein main ussey sun nahi paayi. Agar main ussey sun paati bhi toh bhi kya main us paudhe ko bacha sakti thi? Shaayad nahi.. Shaayad woh sirf kuch hi dino ke liye meri zindagi ko mehakane aaya tha.

Said a river...

I will go and meet the sea one day
The sea...
Vast
Open
Deep
Pure

And when I meet him, I will ask him
Did you also wait for me, like I waited for him... all the time
I am scared he will say he never waited for me.
I am scared he will say he didn't even know I existed.

Maybe I wont need to ask him.
Maybe I will be so happy meeting him that nothing would matter,
No past, no future
Nothing will matter
Maybe I will find him waiting with open arms
Just waiting to embrace me...

And when I meet the sea one day
I will tell him about everything.
About the lands I traveled
About the people I met
About the stories I heard
About the sorrows I lived
About the nights, the long dark lonely nights
About the mornings, beautiful virgin mornings.

Or maybe when i meet the sea one day
I wont have to say a word.
Maybe he will know...everything.
And we will just silently embrace each other